I often get asked the question: “Why do you make dolls?”   I used to bristle a bit when I heard this. I think it’s because when people asked me this question I inevitably heard, “Why don’t you make real art?”  I eventually got over myself.  Now when I get asked this question it makes me happy because I recognize it as an opening to share my passion for my art and to educate people about what it means to be an artist who makes dolls.  One of the things I love about doll making is that it requires that I draw from multiple skill sets to bring a doll into being. There is so much you get to do in doll making.    During a recent stormy evening in Atlanta I was huddled in an interior room of my house with a flashlight flipping through back issues of doll magazines (my version of calm before the storm).  I read this quote in an article by Ankie Daanen:

The basis of doll making is craftsmanship, but it goes beyond this. Dollmaking involves expression and recognizing emotions, along with high-quality craftsmanship and materials,  Dollmaking is much more than just sculpture; it encompasses the viewers total impression and experience. A good doll stays in the memory!

I couldn’t agree more. I try to evoke emotion in all of my dolls. I want people who see my work to not think “cute” (ugh). Instead, my hope is that viewers of my work feel a deeper connection with themselves and to their own creativity when they interact with my pieces. I know I have made a good doll when it makes me laugh out loud. Apparently the laughter is contagious. For the last several weeks I have been working on a commission doll. She has made me laugh and cry in the process of creating her. Last night I looked and realized that she was smiling back at me.  I had to name her Ayo which means joy.

Image from: http://eastsidebooksbishop.com/

I don’t know when or how it happened. I just know that being around books makes my heart race with excitement and my hands sweat. My UPS man has seen me do the happy dance on the porch as he walks up the drive way with my latest box from Amazon. The media specialists at the Atlanta-Fulton library on Ponce know me by name — they even pull my holds from the shelf when they see me come in the door without my having to get in line.  Date night for years with my now husband somehow always ended up in Borders or Charis . . . . For as long as I can remember I have had a deep and abiding love of books.   Thanks to my grandmother I believe I entered school already knowing how to read ( I need to confirm that story with my mother).  What I know for sure is that books and reading have always been and continue to be a central part of my life. Whenever I want to go somewhere, learn something, look at something, be entertained, relax — the first thing I reach for is a book (I also have a weakness for magazines but that’s another post).  I  am starting a new recurring book section here on the blog. I tried to think of  a catchy title for the series but decided to settle on ‘What I am Reading” for future posts. It’s direct and to the point.  Without further delay — here is “what I am reading” this week (and no, i receive no promotions for listing any books or products on this site — I only post about what I have actually read, used and REALLY LIKE). Feel free to write to me if you’d like a short review of any of these books.

1. Mastering the Art of Fabric Printing and Design: Techniques, Tutorials and Inspiration. by Laurie Wisbrun.  Found this book while taking a leisurely browse during an impromptu stop at Barnes and Noble. Wonderful reference book.
2. Alabama Studio Style and Design by Natalie Chanin. I was so excited about this book that I PRE-ORDERED it and I never do that.  I am already making two skirts from this book for my spring wardrobe — a calf-length version and an ankle length version.
3. Yoshida Style: Ball Jointed Doll Making Guide by Ryo Yoshida.  This is the book that my UPS man saw me do the happy dance for. I ordered this book all the way from Japan. It took about 3 weeks for it to get here. Worth the time and every penny. This book will help me in my journey to making my first ball-jointed doll (it’s in Japanese, y’all).
4. The Happy Herbivore by Lindsay Nixon. You may or may not know that I became a vegan in December 2011. Reading lots of cookbooks and food activism books to help me understand what I really need to do. Excellent tasty recipes in this book.
5. Proust was a Neuroscientist by Jonah Lehrer Science has learned a lot from art . . .. .Really enjoying this one.

Smart Goals: Goal Setting the S.M.A.R.T. Way! deborahshanetoolbox.com

One of the most amazing things about living during the time we are living in now is that we have so much access to immediate information.  From public libraries to the twitterverse you can research a topic and find almost anything you are looking for from almost anywhere in the world. You can even find your own personal teacher through demos on youtube.  Of course having access to all of this information also means that we have to be good curators and “filterers” of knowledge and information.

In reading books and articles about early doll makers it always strikes me how often they talk about being self-taught. I have a similar story.  When I was just starting out I learned doll making from books,  patterns and watching you tube.  My first dolls were made from a McCalls pattern of raggedy ann dolls. THen, while I was in graduate school  I used to spend my study breaks at the Looking Glass quilt shop in Ann Arbor, Michigan.  It was there that I really started to study dolls and how they were made. At Looking Glass I found and started collecting the patterns and books of Elinor Peace Bailey. I have always loved her dolls because of what she does with cloth. The engineering of it all!  Cloth dolls are still my favorites but lately I find myself also being pulled in to working with clay.  Right now I am doing original sculpts of clay heads for my dolls.  I work almost exclusively in different types of air dry clay (Creative Paper Clay, La Doll and La Doll Premix). Asking myself “what if” is leading me in the direction of creating full body sculpts in clay. (Oh MY!)

My in-house residency officially ended in March.   What I learned over the last 3 months is a new way of working.  My process now builds in time for new design and reflection. I know it’s should be obvious that you can’t work all of the time but it’s actually hard to remember to stop and rest when you love what you do. So April’s goals will find me building on the work I have  developed during the residency:

1. begin designing my own ball jointed dolls. This type of doll is labor intensive but it is perfect for what I want to do next with clay

2. drawing/painting- two new large pieces I want to finish by August

3.  Ride my BIKE (once the pollen goes away).

Have a great April!!!

YeYe Odo (Mother Water) by Deborah Grayson Studios (c) 2012

How often do you ask yourself this question? It’s one of the best questions that a creative person can ask themselves. Asking myself “what if?” sets off  all kinds of clicking and lights in my head.  My most recent “what if?” came while completing a doll entry for the Mermaids and Merwomen in Black Folklore show at the Charleston Arts Festival.  If you follow me on twitter or have become a fan of my facebook page you have already seen her. I have process shots of the doll in development about.  I LOVE this doll!  I LOVED making this doll. And good news – this week I found out that the doll was juried into the show! I bought her a plane ticket and sent her on her merry way yesterday. But back to my point.  I was talking about “what if’s.”  Since I began my in-house artist residency almost two months ago I have been experimenting with different kinds of air-dry clay and how to make more expressive dolls with that clay.  In the process of experimenting with different stone and air dry clays I was bitten by the clay bug — BAD. I absolutely adore sculpting with clay.  While fabric sculpting and manipulations is still very appealing to me, more and more I find that clay allows me to be even more expressive in my work. So asking myself what if? has led me on an interesting journey.  The first what if’s? I asked myself moved me from a very basic pancake style cloth doll (which I still make and enjoy), to cloth dolls with needle sculpted faces, to cloth dolls with clay heads and fabric bodies. My most recent “what if?”  has led me to my new obsession: DGSBJDs or Deborah Grayson Studios’ Ball Jointed Dolls. The journey begins in the studio today . . . . it all begins with a 3 inch styrofoam ball . . . .

Everyone deserves the joy of pursuing something they love to do –whatever it is. I think the reason why shows like The Voice or even American Idol are so popular is because so many people are fascinated by and even excited to see people risk everything to pursue their dreams. Sometimes I think I am crazy to be an artist let alone a doll maker and quilter and then I think of what it would mean for my life if I could not express myself through art. Not a pretty picture.

I have been happily working through my annual and monthly goals.  My focus since the beginning of the year has been on developing new work.  I think it is finally fully sinking in that sometimes in order to move faster you actually have to go slower.  Since allowing myself to really get immersed in my work — trying out new materials and techniques along the way – I have  found a deeper joy and connection with my work. I am working out ideas and thinking through questions in ways that I have never done.

The figure continues to be a key focus of my work. I am especially interested in telling the stories of women’s lives — who we are, how we feel . . . . Right now I am working with three themes and body types in this narrative:

1. My signature line of dolls, Urban Wildflower Dolls –   portray everyday women in all our beauty and glory. I have refined and blown out my basic pattern a bit to make these dolls a little taller, more expressive with a 3-d head and articulated fingers. A larger body also gives me more canvas to work with.
2. Healing and Spirit dolls (see examples of work in progress above) — right now the theme of dolls in this category are based on African diasporic mythology and folklore. Water spirits and saints are on my mind right now.
3. Izannah Walker dolls — dolls made in the style of the early American doll maker Izannah Walker. I have studied the work of Walker herself as well as the work of modern doll makers Shari Lutz, Susie McMahon and Dixie Redmond. I have also studied a lot of paintings from this era. Of course I had to put my own spin on them.  American Girl Dolls eat your heart out jejejeje : ).

So, lots of work in progress from February. My goal for March is to keep doing what I’m doing  in my in-house residency. . . . making new work, completing works in progress and loving every minute of it.

Okay, back to the work. I’ve got doll heads to prime and paint!

I am feeling especially sentimental on this birthday. Maybe it’s because I am now solidly middle aged . Maybe it’s because yesterday, though i wasn’t planning on it, I sat and watched Whitney Houston’s entire home-going service — and what a home-going it was!!!  The love of family is everything, isn’t it?  As I pray in the next next year of my life I am feeling excited, joy-full, expectant and GRATEFUL!!

• GRATEFUL to God for another year of life, love, health and strength.
• GRATEFUL for a family who taught me that whatever joys or storms life brings that I am to get up, stand up for what I believe in and do what I have been called to do regardless of my circumstance.
• GRATEFUL that I know that none of us can afford to be one issue people. If you want equality and justice for yourself and the people you love then you MUST actively seek  and support this for others whether you like them or not because it is right and it is just to do so.
• Grateful that every one of us has been given great gifts that we can use if we set our hearts, spirits and minds to it.
• Grateful for each one of you for walking and/or dancing this journey with me.

Grateful. Grateful. Grateful. Hezekiah Walker and the Love Fellowship Choir sing it best . . . .

Inspired by . . .

Everything. A doll idea can come from almost anywhere: the patterns on a tree limb, the shape and angle of a shadow, or a name of someone I met on facebook (I see you Fya Queen!).  In short, I am really inspired by — interested in –EVERYTHING. Being an artist is both exhilarating and exhausting (all that visual stimulation, you know) and I LOVE it.

Ideas Drawn

I try to visually document as many of my ideas as I can. This means that I keep a sketchbook.  I always have a small moleskine in my purse or backpack that I use for mostly notes and quick thumbnails. I also keep a larger 8×10 or 9×12 and an even larger 11×11 on my desk in my studio where I sit to do more detailed drawings. I tend to prefer bound as opposed to spiral books. The spiral books  always seem to  snag on something or the covers begin to wear and tear. In case you are wondering my favorites brands right now are made by studiogoods drawing journals and  kunst & papier binderboard sketchbooks.  I number each page and each volume.

Where Do Dolls Come From?

So where do dolls come from? For me they come from dreams, drawings, doodles, scraps of paper that catch my eye, music, the people I meet. . . . you get the idea. Keeping a sketchbooks is one of my most favorite parts of  the creative process. I love the look of them all tattered and bulging on my shelves and tables.  What is you favorite part of the creative process? Do you keep a sketchbook?  How do you collect and store images that inspire you?

PS I use Pinterest as an extension of my sketchbooks. What fun.  If you are on there come on and follow us!

I have aligned the outline I sketched out for my in-house residency with my annual and monthly goals. Here is the outline:

January 

• test new (to me) air dry clays (creative paperclay, La doll, La Doll Premix, Premiere)
• Build new heads during this experiment to test for strength, detail, smoothness
• work on Peace project drawings for quilt

February

• build and test body armatures and connections
•  drape continue working on Peace quilt

March

• complete any work developed during the residency that moves me. Learn from the process about what works and what doesn’t work
• Enjoy myself

Working in silence or with a little Concha Buika or Esperanza Spalding playing in the background I have been focused, determined and getting the work done. Still some days I come home from my day job drained and exhausted and I don’t feel like creating. On those days I still show up for my In-house Residency — my residency in my own studio — to at least touch my work and my materials.  Doing this inevitably leads me to work at least for an hour or two. One of the best things I learned from my family is the importance of showing up everyday — no matter what –to do the job at hand. Showing up no matter what is a reminder to me and a signal to everyone else about what my priorities are. If I truly believe that my blessings are in my hands then I must show up everyday to use them along with my heart and my mind to make art. Yes!

I recently published my goals for 2012 so I am pretty clear on what I need to do for February now that I have the full plan in sight. Plus IT”S MY BIRTHDAY MONTH. I can already feel all the wonderful things in store for me this month (and yes, I do celebrate the entire month).  My goals for the month of February:

1) Continue to focus on creating new work (I have thumb nails for three quilts completed and have started the first quilt).

2) New doll sculpts are underway. Now that I have all of the bugs worked out of my new designs it’s time to get to building! I have seven heads on the table ready to go. I have already sculpted details into three. See examples above . . . .

3) Complete January’s bookkeeping.

4) I’ve been working late a lot lately so I have been missing my evening yoga class. Hope to get back on schedule this month starting NEXT WEEK.

5) Finish moving in to the new website. Still some new content to post : ).

6) Write

In rememberance of Brother Don Cornelious, I wish you LOVE, PEACE and SOOOOOUUUUUUUUULLLLLLL!!!!! Have a fabulous February!

I used to go through all kinds of contortions to come up with a name other than “doll” to describe my work (insert trumpets and a flourish with boas and big feathers here). I considered calling my work figurative sculpture, three-dimensional figurative paintings, supercalifragilisticexpialidocious figures (for the Mary Poppins fans).   I finally decided that the word doll is exactly what I should use. By definition the word doll means “a model of a human being.”  The second part of that definition, however, usually reads “often used as a toy for children.”  When people think of dolls they often do think of  toys.  There are definitely dolls that are designed as toys for children.  There are also dolls that are designed to be collected and displayed for their beauty, nostalgia, historical significance and financial value. These dolls are not made as toys but as collectible works of art.

Don’t get me wrong, there is artistry in all doll making just as there is an element of play in all creativity. My hope is that the dolls I make embody both artistry and fun and that they will expand your mind about what a doll can do and be.  There is something magical and spiritual to me about a doll and about making a doll.  To take a hunk of clay or a piece of fabric, among other materials, and to sculpt or manipulate them into something that resembles a figure from your mind’s eye is a powerful and transformative thing.  I plan to write more about dolls and the experience and process of making them in later posts.  For now  I will say that I am Deborah. I am an artist who makes dolls.  I believe that dolls are art and that they are beautiful. . . .